Alan Greenspan, Influential Economic Policymaker Whom I Once Terrified At A Party, Is Dead

Alan Greenspan died today. The longtime fed chairman was once hailed as the most powerful man in the world. Greenspan was 100 years old. Back to me: A couple of cool, smart, and nice D.C. friends of mine wrote a book that came out in the summer of 2009, and other cool, smart, and nice D.C. friends threw them a party. Some of the most powerful people in the city, meaning some of the most powerful people in the world, were invited. They also put me on the guest list. The invite said the party would tip off at 6:30 p.m., but I found no dress code, and I'm thinking the hosts know what they're gonna get couture-wise from McKenna, so as usual I just take whatever's risen to the top of the pile in the walk-on closet in my bedroom and throw it on. I show up an hour late at a beautiful house in the tony Kalorama neighborhood, and when I walk inside I hear all the noise coming from the backyard, which has an entrance to the side of the front door, and I look out the windows and see everybody looking fancy as hell and face the fact I fucked up, fashion-wise. Plus it’s D.C. hot outside and my car air conditioning had been broken for years, so I’m sweating like Marion Barry and the AC inside the house feels real boss. So instead of immediately going out back, I keep walking past that backyard entrance and toward the kitchen to see if there's anybody lagging in the house who I can bother while I decompress and let my pores close, but I quickly determine that everybody's outside and I better join the party before I'm caught wandering the halls.