Congo Was Ready For The Moment, And For Portugal

So that settles it then: Iberia's Team is Andorra. And the Andorrans didn't even know they were an option. This is what happens when Spain can't get past Cape Verde and then, maybe even more shockingly, Portugal gets stymied by the Democratic Republic of Congo. That is to say, two of the heaviest favorites in this World Cup, each one of the most historically dominant teams in international soccer history, take nothing but shame from dropping points to a team that has never been in any World Cup and another that had never scored a goal in one. Middle fingers to the big man have never stood quite so proudly. The internet has already glommed onto the Blue Whales, but now it has to double back on the Warriors of the Equator after a 1-1 draw that was almost even more dramatic. A clothesline by Tomás Araújo on Congo star Yoane Wissa four minutes from the end drew a yellow card but also stopped a scoring opportunity for Wissa, whom Premier League dorks know from Newcastle United and who had scored Congo's goal just before halftime. He was breaking toward the underbothered Portuguese goal when Araújo took a chance on a red card to save a goal scoring chance. He got away with it, and the game ended 1-1 rather than 2-1 Leopards as a result, thus robbing Andorra of even more bragging rights and the Portuguese from drawing up plans to recolonize Cape Verde to steal their point.